play ball

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I’ve been thinking about grief and stress and how people deal with life when things go very wrong and whether you can really “choose” your reaction to the curve balls that life throws you. And life will throw you curves, that’s a given for all of us eventually and one that I sometimes think we try too hard to shield our children from, especially here in 21st century America. Everybody has “stuff”, so I wonder, why do some people’s knees buckle under the weight of all that stuff, while other people seem to accept that weight, do a few push-ups, and use it to grow stronger?

It’s not the load that breaks you down – it’s the way you carry it. ~Lou Holtz

12 thoughts on “play ball”

  1. Great quote. I’m not a Lou Holtz fan but I agree with him and I agree with you. Sheltering your kids too much is not doing them a favor.

  2. the human psyche in each of us, i think, is like an architecture–not just one house but a city, ancient and modern. we live among its structures and we sometimes (soulfully) NEED to use life to break open some things; to rebuild–but our culture and our religions no longer allow for it. What we judge as sick or healthy, on a deeper poke with a good-eyed stick might not be perceived properly.

    I keep thinking lately, what is health, and what is sick. Globally; emotionally; like the feminist critics say, the personal IS public. America is running on consume and greed–on surface glitz. Bread and Circus. The soul won’t maintain that.

    I read once, a fiction writer say something like Life is like a grater and we are like the nutmeg it MUST scrape against in order for our soulful fragrance to rise–SOmething like that. But … who knows.

  3. I once heard that allowing your kids to experience disappointment and heartache while they are still young and protected and have a safe place to live and their own bed and parents who will do anything for them helps them to learn how to deal with it before they have too many other uncertain variables in their life. As much as we think keeping our kids in a protective bubble is good parenting, letting them experience a few of life bumps is probably better.

  4. I’ve asked myself this very same question. Someone pointed me to a speech that Tony Robbins gave where he discussed the same topic. He said that during a crisis..if you are touched by the kindness of a stranger, and able to appreciate that a stranger (who has no ties to you whatsoever), wants to make things better..that you tend to pull yourself up and pull yourself together faster.

    I thought that was interesting. I know I did not say it like he did but after looking at certain situations in my own life, I tend to agree with him. I guess it reminds you that there is inherent good in the world.. and that makes you feel more positive about the situation. I can’t seem to find the link to the lecture or I would share it.

  6. In my own case I have been able to handle the curve balls by remembering that God is wearing the catcher’s mask …and calling the plays…its a simple matter of trust.

    When I find it hard to trust that God has it under control I can easily trust that I have no control .

    I work with at risk youth each day and just today I counseled two of them that sometimes we have no control over what happens to us, but we always have control over how we will react. Its one of the few things we can totally control so we need to make a decision on how we want to be defined in this life. Our chosen reactions define us.

    …they looked at me like I was a flippin idiot and went back to class. Oh well –

  8. Very thought provoking. Some great comments too. I think as we get older, and can recall those times when we really struggled with life circumstances and lived to tell about it, we can muster the patience necessary to wait before giving our final answer on how dire the outcome might be. Pappy

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